![lacigreen:
sexreeducated:
Triangular Theory of Love
Nonlove “refers simply to the absence of all three components of love. Nonlove characterizes the large majority of our personal relationships, which are simply casual interactions.”
Liking/friendship is “used here in a nontrivial sense. Rather, it refers to the set of feelings one experiences in relationships that can truly be characterized as friendship. One feels closeness, bondedness, and warmth toward the other, without feelings of intense passion or long-term commitment.”
Infatuated love: “infatuation results from the experiencing of passionate arousal in the absence of intimacy and decision/commitment…like Tennov’s limerance.”[5] Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. A stronger love may deteriorate into empty love. In an arranged marriage, the spouses’ relationship may begin as empty love and develop into another form, indicating “how empty love need not be the terminal state of a long-term relationship…[but] the beginning rather than the end.”
Romantic love “derives from a combination of the intimate and passionate components of love…romantic lovers are not only drawn physically to each other but are also bonded emotionally” - bonded both intimately and passionately, but without sustaining commitment.
Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment. “This type of love is observed in long-term marriages where passion is no longer present” but where a deep affection and commitment remain. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship.
Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage - “fatuous in the sense that a commitment is made on the basis of passion without the stabilizing influence of intimate involvement.”
Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing an ideal relationship toward which people strive. Of the seven varieties of love, consummate love is theorized to be that love associated with the “perfect couple.” According to Sternberg, these couples will continue to have great sex fifteen years or more into the relationship, they cannot imagine themselves happier over the long-term with anyone else, they overcome their few difficulties gracefully, and each delight in the relationship with one other. However, Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action. “Without expression,” he warns, “even the greatest of loves can die.” Thus, consummate love may not be permanent. If passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.
By far one of my favorite love theories in Psychology. I don’t know why they didn’t teach this when I was much much younger. Knowing the proper terms for how one feels about another is the first step towards emotional maturity. Nobody wants to call their feelings “Puppy Love” when “Fatuous Love” sounds so much more appropriate.
I totally agree that it’s a step toward emotional maturity. Iit provides language yeah, but it also provides context and scope. It illustrates that there are different kinds of love in relationships amidst “fairytale culture” that tends to give teenagers overly romantic and sometimes damaging imagery about what “love” should be.](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3jjw6M5dq1rrtgyjo1_1280.jpg)
Triangular Theory of Love
- Nonlove “refers simply to the absence of all three components of love. Nonlove characterizes the large majority of our personal relationships, which are simply casual interactions.”
- Liking/friendship is “used here in a nontrivial sense. Rather, it refers to the set of feelings one experiences in relationships that can truly be characterized as friendship. One feels closeness, bondedness, and warmth toward the other, without feelings of intense passion or long-term commitment.”
- Infatuated love: “infatuation results from the experiencing of passionate arousal in the absence of intimacy and decision/commitment…like Tennov’s limerance.”[5] Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
- Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. A stronger love may deteriorate into empty love. In an arranged marriage, the spouses’ relationship may begin as empty love and develop into another form, indicating “how empty love need not be the terminal state of a long-term relationship…[but] the beginning rather than the end.”
- Romantic love “derives from a combination of the intimate and passionate components of love…romantic lovers are not only drawn physically to each other but are also bonded emotionally” - bonded both intimately and passionately, but without sustaining commitment.
- Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment. “This type of love is observed in long-term marriages where passion is no longer present” but where a deep affection and commitment remain. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship.
- Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage - “fatuous in the sense that a commitment is made on the basis of passion without the stabilizing influence of intimate involvement.”
- Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing an ideal relationship toward which people strive. Of the seven varieties of love, consummate love is theorized to be that love associated with the “perfect couple.” According to Sternberg, these couples will continue to have great sex fifteen years or more into the relationship, they cannot imagine themselves happier over the long-term with anyone else, they overcome their few difficulties gracefully, and each delight in the relationship with one other. However, Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action. “Without expression,” he warns, “even the greatest of loves can die.” Thus, consummate love may not be permanent. If passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.
By far one of my favorite love theories in Psychology. I don’t know why they didn’t teach this when I was much much younger. Knowing the proper terms for how one feels about another is the first step towards emotional maturity. Nobody wants to call their feelings “Puppy Love” when “Fatuous Love” sounds so much more appropriate.
I totally agree that it’s a step toward emotional maturity. Iit provides language yeah, but it also provides context and scope. It illustrates that there are different kinds of love in relationships amidst “fairytale culture” that tends to give teenagers overly romantic and sometimes damaging imagery about what “love” should be.
(via sexylokiface)
When I was a student at Cambridge I remember an anthropology professor holding up a picture of a bone with 28 incisions carved in it. “This is often considered to be man’s first attempt at a calendar” she explained. She paused as we dutifully wrote this down. ‘My question to you is this – what man needs to mark 28 days? I would suggest to you that this is woman’s first attempt at a calendar.’ It was a moment that changed my life. In that second I stopped to question almost everything I had been taught about the past. How often had I overlooked women’s contributions?
—
Sandi Toksvig WILL ALWAYS AND FOREVER REBLOG THIS QUOTE
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I’m taking a class called The Archaeology of Sex and Gender (I’m an anthropology and art history major), and we were studying female figurines from the Neolithic era. Some girl in my class brought up the point that when male figurines with giant phalli were discovered, they were interpreted by academics as symbols of power. When female figures with giant vulvas were discovered, they were interpreted by academics as symbols of fertility. “Why can’t the giant vulva be a symbol of power too?” she asked.
It blew my mind and reaffirmed my decision to study anthropology and art history.
(via strugglingtobeheard)
Always seek knowledge
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Always reblog. This is so awesome.
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(via collectingapples) (via storybook)
Such a good quote.
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This quote gives me chills every time I read it. Also, awesome story, strugglingtobeheard!
(via miss-education)
This reminds me of a conversation a friend and I had recently about our work. She’s in the very early stages of writing her dissertation on scribes in early medieval England, specifically female scribes. One of the things we vented about was the universal assumption that men copied the vast majority of manuscripts in the period, when there’s actually very, very little evidence to suggest that level of exclusivity. There are very few manuscripts we know for a fact were copied by men, and most are anonymous. And if you look at the nature of religious institutions in England and the status of women between 700-1000ish, 1.) quite a few monasteries were founded by aristocratic women; 2.) many were dual houses, which housed both male and female religious, and some of those houses were politically influential—and also headed by women—and thus were likely to have access to good libraries; 3.) there is evidence that women in important institutions were reading and writing correspondence in Latin; and 4.) there is also evidence that noble women were patrons of book production and literate themselves (in the vernacular if not in Latin), because wills from the period survive in which women bequeath their libraries to various people. None of this is concrete, but I don’t think it’s a leap to argue that it’s almost just as likely any given anonymous copyist could as easily be a woman as a man. But in manuscript studies, the assumption is always that, unless the text might have some “obvious” interest to women, the copyist is a man. Which is pretty damn ridiculous, and just another reminder that the effacement of women’s contributions to civilization and the transmission (and generation!) of knowledge is an ongoing process of willful forgetting, as well as ignorance.
(via dr-wtfox)
(via meatandsarcasm)
I can relate to the statues of women with giant reproductive parts being labeled as “degrading” or “fertility” when I thought it represented power.
Basically not everything revolves around 1950’s middle class/Victorian period gender roles people.
(via sandwichocracy)
(via zumie-monster)
The same thing goes in my field (Theology and Biblical Studies) except maybe even more so, because the Bible openly acknowledges women who held a great deal of social and economic power in both the Old and New Testaments- and yet they are routinely glossed over by scholarship and indeed erased in official translations*. We know so comparatively little about Ancient Israel that there’s no overwhelmingly compelling reason to suggest women could not have played a role in the composition of the Tanakh, and the New Testament itself makes explicit the importance of women within the early Christian movement, especially older, educated and wealthy women- so what’s to stop a woman being behind some of the New Testament writings (especially given that so many are disputed in authorship)?
*Easy way to detect if the Bible translation you own has a sexist bias: look up Romans 16:1 and 1 Timothy 3:8. If the former calls Phoebe a “servant” of the church but the latter refers to regulations for “deacons”, congratulations! The translators of your Bible deliberately chose to erase evidence of the ordination of women in the early church! Both verses in fact feature exactly the same word, diakonos, which certainly can mean servant, but is also the word for deacon, an order of Christian ministry that exists to this day.
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in light of recent events I felt it was necessary to update the snowietailnom photoset.
babies what are you doing
tails aren’t for eating sweetums
Adorable.
I bet Tai Lung did this as a cub.
/Kung Fu Panda nerdery
(Source: tryph)
(Source: fyeahgenderqueers, via sexylokiface)
I created a same sex marriage map:
-black: ban on same sex marriage
-translucent flag: civil unions or domestic partnerships for same sex couples
-opaque flag: marriage equality
I never realized it was this bad!
This is why Iowa is fabulous. Hope the rest of you all can join us soon ^_^
go wasHINGTON
YEAH WASHINGTON HAAHAH
well at least Illinois isn’t black eeep
gosh darnit North Carolina
you have failed me Louisiana
(via sexylokiface)
Noctuary: ishouldbedoinghw: Good Omens BBC miniseries in 2013 Reporting directly...
Good Omens BBC miniseries in 2013
Reporting directly from Neil Gaiman’s blog: Good Omens, the fagnificent spawn of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, is being adapted for television by Terry Jones (Monty Python) and Gavin Scott (Small Soldiers). The producer will…
Omg!!!
(Source: johnhwatson-, via catphistopheles)
(Source: sekra)
A very lucky boy
(Source: linapotter, via littlesouthernsparkplug)
what is this costume accuracy you speak of 8)a
cakegun answered: costume swap of the Avengers?
well if this is what you mean by costume swap, i hope you’re okay with my choices muahaha
OH MY GOD, IT’S BACK ON MY DASH.
(via chemicalfreak)
Coulson lent them his Special Edition Captain America deck of cards.
In the event of damage, Tony will be tazed.
In the event of naked Captain America, however, he might be inclined to call it even.
mmmmm. yes.
(via littlesouthernsparkplug)
This might be the best 35 seconds of your day.
significantly cheered me up
this saved my day
I CANT BREATHE
why is this so funny hahaha
(via sexylokiface)
![brer lapin [on the moon]](http://25.media.tumblr.com/avatar_53cf49975e29_48.png "brer lapin [on the moon]"){kind=avatar}
